Guest Blogger: The Urbane Terrorist

How do you do?

(do what?)

No – it is a greeting.  How are you doing, old chap??

(Old? who you callin Old, dipstick!)

Forgive me, let me start again…

.

Permit me to introduce myself, for I… am the Urbane Terrorist.

(You don’t look Pakistani!)

That’s because i am not, in fact, Pakistani, nor of any Arabian persuasion, i am quite Cosmopolitan!

( Ohhhh! – yer an eye-tie then?? Never been to Italy myself)

[Mutters under breath – you DO surprise me! Aloud:] I am the vanguard of an entirely new generation of Terrorism.

(You work for Securicor then? Pays well does it? Get to wear a shiny gun’ n everythin’?)

Oh Dear, I fear I am not explaining myself very well… Old fashioned Terrorists used fear as a weapon, primarily through the arbitrary application of explosives, selected kidnappings, murder, rape and the infrequent hijacking of aeroplanes so as to use them as deadly weapons of destruction…

(Bloody Obama!)

???!!   Oh! Yeeeeess… i seeeee… hmmmm….? Where was I again?

( Buggered if I know, Matey!)

… But their time is past – what I am espousing is the evolution of Terrorism into a newer, higher form. One that uses the sharp knife of the Intellect to cut away at the heart of the Global hegemony not the steel blade; shoots down hypocrisy with bullets of living truth, not bullets of dead lead; and that kills the corporate and political lies our leaders and their oppositions spread with the help of their cronies in kind, the Media Barons, rather than kills the bodies and souls of the populace they gnaw on for their fattening.

(Come again?)

Look – do you HAVE to be here?

(I’m just waitin fer me bus mate!)

Do you think you could do so SILENTLY???

(  )

Thank You. Friends, Fellow weary travellers, for too long have we remained silent; for too long have we let those men of violence take up arms against those whom WE have created, encouraged and enrichened with our labour and toil, for too long have we let our voices be silent and our will be trampled until it is but a mere shadow of what it should now be. For  a decade now we have been complicit in the sending of men of valour and honour to die in vain, defending not our freedom, but our overlord’s right to make massive profit from Arms manufacture and whipping up hateful sentiment amongst us so as to make media profits; to die, not in a battle for our country’s defence, but a battle against those who would stand up for their own rights in their own countries. Osama’s enemies are indeed the same as our own and they live among us in the very finest of lifestyles while determining the downfall of of ours. They are the ones who are the masters of fear and they use it very effectively upon each and every single one of us.

It is time we turned their tables over, removed them from the temple of the Holy Dollar and unite to send a very clear message to them… a message that will chill their spineless backs with fear…

WE are wise to your formerly profitable game… we will no longer remain stupefied and silent, for we are the vast majority and when we combine our voice your ivory towers will tremble and soon crumble under it’s unstoppable force.

It is time, my friends, the time has finally come… to shout out in every way possible…

WE WILL PUT UP WITH THIS NO MORE!

WE, THE PEOPLE, ARE SPEAKING!

NO LONGER ARE WE SHEEP TO BE SHORN AND HERDED –

WE ARE LIONS AND OUR ROARS WILL BE HEARD!

(clapclapclapclapclapclap)

 

Thank you.

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